50 Ways To Leave Your Lover

Almost as many erotic relationships end as are started. I mean, it might be nice to have lots of friends with benefits so that you are never without a handy sex partner, but for some reason our society still has not reached this level of maturity.

Back to the point of this diatribe; if you are going to be good at getting into many relationships, you have to be just as good at getting out of them. For some reason, people getting into relationships just never figure the odds that you have to get out of most of them. Since the average person now-a-days has about 8 or 9 intimate relationships before settling down, that means that if you have 9 relationships before forming a permanent bond with someone, it means that you had to have ended 8 of them. Putting it mathematically, if R = the number of relationships that you start, then R-1 is the number of relationships that you had to end. OUCH!


Good Break Up Tips

1. Do It Privately

The best situation when breaking up with someone is to do it at his or her place. A lot of people say go somewhere public so they won’t make a scene. But sometimes the scene is inevitable, and you don’t want to be in public when that happens. Do it at their place, and then if they want to break something, it’s their stuff. They can kick you out, and you can leave peacefully. They don’t feel embarrassed if you’re out in public. It’s their safe place, so it’s best.

2. Do It Just Before A Weekend

This is a consideration for them so that they can get it back together before having to go to work. Often people will miss work the next day. If they get fired, then you have the added guilt of them losing their job as a result of you breaking up with them. You want to avoid that. In any event, it gives them a chance to call up other close friends and thoroughly trash you, drink themselves into oblivion, cry themselves out, and get over the ensuing hangover without missing a day of work.

3. Give Space and Time

The best way to effectively have a smooth break-up is limit the time you’re together with your ex immediately after the dumping. If you start seeing someone new, don’t take them to your ex’s regular haunt. Don’t rub your new partner in their face! And, if you need to talk to friends about the reason you broke up, choose friends that are not common friends. Otherwise, you’re asking for a soap opera, and I mean that in a bad way. Even though I watch soap operas. They’re hot. And they have bikinis.


Things Not To Do When Breaking Up

1. Pick your breakup turf carefully so as to minimize sharp objects and hard objects. Both of these types of things can be used on you in a fit of anger or despair. So, kitchens, craft rooms and work-rooms are out. For the same reasons, do not end it in a hardware store or kitchen specialty shop if you have to end it in public for some reason.

2. Do not put yourself into a situation where after you break up, you are forced to be near your ex for a period of time. So, do not do it while on a trip or a vacation. Do not do it while touring the Statue of Liberty. In other words, when picking the turf to break up on, you need a clean and private exit strategy for both of you.

3. Have a couple of answers up your sleeve for the inevitable "why" question. Just get them out and do not let yourself get trapped into a debate. Stick to your guns. If you do not, then you will inevitably get put into a position to give it another try. Keep it clean and final!

And remember – there are plenty of fish in the sea!

Good luck!

For more advice articles, check out the following links:
Relationships Advice for Men


Relationships Advice for Women





If you have broken up recently and are looking for love, then check the following:
Top 10 Dating Sites

Tips For Breaking Up

Let’s face it: sometimes things go south in a relationship. I’m not sure why they call something bad “going south”. I love going south. It’s warm. Lots of bikinis.

But back to the point – sometimes you have to break up with a partner. It’s never fun, but there are things you can do to make it less awful. My advice: do it as soon as possible – that way you can get over it, and move on to trying to find the right person.


Good Break Up Tips

1. Do Not Do It In A Public Place

Many times, a breakup will be emotional. Sometimes throwing things emotional. Sometimes crying emotional. In any event, being in a very public place, like a restaurant, airs these emotions in front of too many people. Restaurants are also difficult to leave quickly because at least one of you has to stick around long enough to pay the bill.

2. Do It Just Before A Weekend

This is a consideration for them so that they can get it back together before having to go to work. Often people will miss work the next day. If they get fired, then you have the added guilt of them losing their job as a result of you breaking up with them. You want to avoid that. In any event, it gives them a chance to call up other close friends and thoroughly trash you, drink themselves into oblivion, cry themselves out, and get over the ensuing hangover without missing a day of work.

3. Give Space and Time

The best way to effectively have a smooth break-up is limit the time you’re together with your ex immediately after the dumping. If you start seeing someone new, don’t take them to your ex’s regular haunt. Don’t rub your new partner in their face! And, if you need to talk to friends about the reason you broke up, choose friends that are not common friends. Otherwise, you’re asking for a soap opera, and I mean that in a bad way. Even though I watch soap operas. They’re hot. And they have bikinis.


Things Not To Do When Breaking Up

1. Don’t break up in the knife department at Sears. There are too many temptations for them to give you a little going-away present (like a circumcision, or an impromptu hair cut). If you have to do it out in public, do it at the marshmallow factory. There are very few sharp edges there.

2. Do not put yourself into a situation where after you break up, you are forced to be near your ex for a period of time. So, do not do it while on a trip or a vacation. Do not do it while touring the Statue of Liberty. In other words, when picking the turf to break up on, you need a clean and private exit strategy for both of you.

3. If they start asking why you want to end it, don’t get caught up in a debate. If they can out argue you, you might be tempted to give it another try. It’s a trap! Stick to your guns, and wish them the best. After all, the sooner they find someone new, the sooner you can start double dating and, if you’re lucky and the sex was good, wife swapping.

Well, not literally. Thanks to over-fishing it’s actually kind of concerning how few fish there are in the sea. But you know what I mean. We should think up a more factual expression.

Good luck!

For more advice articles, check out the following links:
Relationships Advice for Men


Relationships Advice for Women





If you have broken up recently and are looking for love, then check the following:
Top 10 Dating Sites

Breaking Up Is Often The Hardest Part Of A Relationship

Let’s face it: sometimes things go south in a relationship. I’m not sure why they call something bad “going south”. I love going south. It’s warm. Lots of bikinis.

If you have 8 intimate relationships in your lifetime, then you had to break up 7 times. The numbers just follow. It is never easy, but it can be a  lot harder on everyone if you approach it badly.


Good Break Up Tips

1. Do It Privately

The best situation when breaking up with someone is to do it at his or her place. A lot of people say go somewhere public so they won’t make a scene. But sometimes the scene is inevitable, and you don’t want to be in public when that happens. Do it at their place, and then if they want to break something, it’s their stuff. They can kick you out, and you can leave peacefully. They don’t feel embarrassed if you’re out in public. It’s their safe place, so it’s best.

2. Do It Just Before A Weekend

This is a consideration for them so that they can get it back together before having to go to work. Often people will miss work the next day. If they get fired, then you have the added guilt of them losing their job as a result of you breaking up with them. You want to avoid that. In any event, it gives them a chance to call up other close friends and thoroughly trash you, drink themselves into oblivion, cry themselves out, and get over the ensuing hangover without missing a day of work.

3. Give Space and Time

The best way to effectively have a smooth break-up is limit the time you’re together with your ex immediately after the dumping. If you start seeing someone new, don’t take them to your ex’s regular haunt. Don’t rub your new partner in their face! And, if you need to talk to friends about the reason you broke up, choose friends that are not common friends. Otherwise, you’re asking for a soap opera, and I mean that in a bad way. Even though I watch soap operas. They’re hot. And they have bikinis.


Bad Break Up Don'ts

1. Pick your breakup turf carefully so as to minimize sharp objects and hard objects. Both of these types of things can be used on you in a fit of anger or despair. So, kitchens, craft rooms and work-rooms are out. For the same reasons, do not end it in a hardware store or kitchen specialty shop if you have to end it in public for some reason.

2. Do not break up in a place where you will have to be together for a long period of time afterwards. Breaking up while on vacation is bad. Breaking up if you are on an island where you have to take the ferry back is also bad. Breaking up in some rural setting is bad unless you both came in separate vehicles.

3. If they start asking why you want to end it, don’t get caught up in a debate. If they can out argue you, you might be tempted to give it another try. It’s a trap! Stick to your guns, and wish them the best. After all, the sooner they find someone new, the sooner you can start double dating and, if you’re lucky and the sex was good, wife swapping.

Well, not literally. Thanks to over-fishing it’s actually kind of concerning how few fish there are in the sea. But you know what I mean. We should think up a more factual expression.

Good luck!

For more advice articles, check out the following links:

Relationships Advice for Men  
Relationships Advice for Women

If you have broken up recently and are looking for love, then check the following:
Top 10 Dating Sites